When arguments happen between people, it is often due to our inability to let go of our own right-eousness. We think we are right and the opposite party is wrong. Therefore, until the other party accepts our viewpoints, our impulse will be to continue to push up the heat on the verbal exchange and often this has the potential to end relationships, friendships, business partnerships. Enemies, wars, feuds, grudges are created, sometimes for life or even many lives… There are areas of life that we have to tiptoe through due to awkwardness and avoidance linked to the past…

Really, so much trouble created from an insubstantial viewpoint that cannot even be seen, found or maintained for a long time. Sometimes, even if we do not argue out loud with the person, but within our minds, we create an incessant mental dialogue about who is right or wrong that saps our energy and drives all awareness out. Then it will also recondition our future actions which may simply be just postponing the inevitable conflict…

Sometimes, a small part of us knows that we are on the way to a catastrophic argument with the other party that has little benefit, but yet, we can’t seem to let go of our righteousness and our impulse overwhelms all common-sense and we continue the reckless exchange of words with a fiery blindness…

From my own experience, it is seen that many of these so-called viewpoints are just mental build-ups that are completely unrealistic and unreliable. For instance, someone who just had a bad day fending off clients who were demanding, becomes quite defensive and brings that kind of attitude into interpreting whatever happens at home with her family. A family member may say something quite innocently, but she will take it as a personal affront and burst into an irate back-and-forth until anger is beyond control.

It can be seen from this example that due to our past histories, conditioning and automatic reactions, we tend to elaborate on a lot of concepts on top of what is actually happening directly in our experience of the situation. For eg, if we see someone dropping some used tissue on the streets, we might immediately create more mental elaborations about how this person must be some inconsiderate, selfish, uneducated brute who has poor parental guidance. He must have been doing this all along in the past and the world is in such a dirty state because of such people etc etc etc. … The fact is that all that is seen, is merely a person dropping a used tissue period.  And he may have simply dropped it accidentally.

Similarly, we are prone to creating a lot of mental elaborations above the nitty-gritty situations of life. If we realise that we are doing this, although it is not possible right away to transcend the creation of the stories at the moment they arise, but it is possible to stop proliferating it, or even to step back and let go of it. (Because these elaborations are unreal, will pass and probably irrational in some way. ) Then it would not be possible for these elaborations to make us deeply opinionated. We become less egoistic and more receptive to the viewpoints of others. It is actually possible to stop insisting and start looking from the viewpoints of others.

Here, I am talking of genuinely letting go of one’s own viewpoint from even within our mind, and looking from other perspectives. To back down from an argument out of meekness or fear and then to engage in it furiously in your mind is still insufficient, because we are still glued to deep belief in our own opinions. How often have we had sleepless nights debating back and forth in our mind, imagining further scenarios and creating unnecessary distress/anger?

This is not to say that one should give up all of one’s opinions and become a ‘Yes-man’.   We may know our Ps and Qs, have our own ideas about things, but we no longer subscribe to them inflexibly. For instance, we should still have principles in accordance to Cause-and-effect, Bodhichitta and Ultimate Truth, because if we are unable to live according to these principles, they will naturally provoke some kind of external or internal conflict in us.

But in addition to that, there is also some kind of understanding into the nature of mental elaborations, they are seen as something quite weak and transient, instead of being stone-etched and unchangeable. And we know that oftentimes, there are exceptions to everything and allow for space for fixed opinions to be dissolved. When arguments brew, we can almost see it coming, and there is an understanding in us that allows us to change direction with flexibility and a willingness to concede and accept before anything drastic happens.

Most importantly, when you are able to see through your own mental constructs and elaborations and be no longer binded or blinded by them, you will be able to release them when they have arisen, then a sense of deeper relaxation and bliss will arise in your experience and fill your life with deeper clarity and simplicity.

I think of course, for this to happen, it takes frequent self-reflection, self-questioning, honesty, sincerity, mindfulness and even a consistent practice of meditation (Note: there are many kinds of meditation, i am referring to those meditations that have the attitude and orientation of facing up to reality/life and to see things with deeper clarity, rather than meditations that emphasize escaping or disassociation from ordinary life and tunes you out…)

Hope what I say makes sense, though it is difficult to explain how I feel in words…

]]> http://bodhiactivity.wordpress.com/2012/01/27/overelaboration/feed/ 0 bodhiactivity http://bodhiactivity.wordpress.com/2012/01/19/chagdud-tulku-stories/ http://bodhiactivity.wordpress.com/2012/01/19/chagdud-tulku-stories/#comments Thu, 19 Jan 2012 17:00:49 +0000 bodhiactivity http://bodhiactivity.wordpress.com/?p=688 ]]> Please visit this website… many great stories about a Master I admire so much

http://lordofthedance.chagdud.org

“One of the stories I like to tell in this regard is a tale of Venerable Master Hsüan Hua’s teacher. Master Hua was the abbot of the City of Ten Thousand Buddhas. He was the person who gave us the land where our monastery is situated, and he and Ajahn Sumedho were very good friends. Master Hua’s teacher, Venerable Master Hsü Yün, was the patriarch of all five lineages of Buddhism in China and was very highly respected. He was the head of the Ch’an lineage, the sutra lineage, the mantra lineage, the Vinaya lineage, and the esoteric lineage. It’s no secret that different sects tend to argue with each other. Yet he was so indisputably pure and skilled that everyone wanted him to be the head. When the Red Chinese took over, they were trying to wipe out religion altogether and so he became a very obvious target. The Chinese army attacked his monastery when he was about 110 years old. They beat him with wooden clubs until he was a bloody heap on the ground and left him for dead. Even though he had broken bones and damaged organs, he recovered. The news of his survival spread around the area.

A while later the Red Army came back and used iron bars to beat him until he was a complete mess. This frail old man was really smashed up and seriously injured, and yet he still didn’t die. His disciples were nursing him and trying to help heal his deep and serious wounds. All of them were amazed that he was still alive. Needless to say, he had incredible meditative powers, so his disciples were convinced that he was sustaining his life energy for them. They believed that the master realized the feeling of grief they would have when he died because they were all very devoted to him. And so they implored him: “Please, don’t stay alive just for our sakes. We’re very touched that you would endure the weeks and weeks of pain and misery because of not wanting to leave us grief stricken. But if it’s time for you to die, we would prefer that you just let yourself go peacefully instead of enduring all this agony.” And he said, “What I’m doing is not for you. It’s true I’m keeping myself alive, but it’s not for your sake, it’s for the soldiers. If I died as a result of their beatings, the karmic retribution for those who attacked me would be so great, I couldn’t bear to be responsible for that.” After that, the army left him alone. He survived and even taught retreats again. The books Ch’an and Zen Training, translated by Charles Luk, are from the Dharma talks that he gave at a retreat four years later. He died when he was 120. He had made a vow to be a monk for one hundred years.”

~ Ajahn Amaro

1.  Recite any prayer, mantra, Buddha name, spiritual practice (including meditation) etc.  that you like best and feel closest to… for me, since tomorrow is Dakini day and I have been doing Tara mini monlams all along, so I will pledge 10,000 Tara mantras for the benefit of all beings…

2.  Do it for a specified number of repetition.  The number should be abit challenging for you, but should not be too challenging that you feel extremely stressed to do it.  You should set yourself a time frame to finish it.

3.  At the conclusion of each session, dedicate it for Universal Liberation of all Beings, Global Peace, No disasters, Well-being of global economy, etc. as  you can think of.

4.  This practice should be on top of (or additional to ) what you practice daily already.  This is to put a level of sincerity and exertion in it.

5.  You simply join your palms at your heart and face this image shown below of a holy Vajrasattva Stupa (near Lhasa), adjust your motivation to Bodhichitta, and, from your heart, make your commitment specifically and then it’s done!

There is no need to report your commitment to me.  Buddhas and Bodhisattvas know your commitment automatically, just do it from your heart and we are on our way.

May the positive group momentum from this mini-monlam, the power of the prayers, the strength of all the good-will and dedications, and the blessings of the Buddhas and Bodhisattvas we invoke be completely dedicated to the ultimate liberation of all beings from all forms of sufferings and delusions.

Happy Monlam!

Meet Ani Ngawang Pema, who has retreated for 45 years reciting the mani mantra.  Very inspiring.

http://www.sherpaworld.com/show.php?at=1&sn=3233

This morning, His Holiness gave a teaching on the working of Mara and how we should be counteracting the challenges posed by the Mara and his manifestations. Mara does not like virtuous activities, therefore he manifests as laziness, body pains, anger and all sorts of emotions to discourage us when we perform virtuous activities. We have to be strong enough to fight with him and move ahead like a bulldozer. These challenges are good if we know how to use them as support. As they will be able to accelerate our progress on the spiritual path. We should not be weakened by Mara and his manifestations, instead we should be working on them as a practice. When we succeed, when we win over them, we will have positive results in our practice.

His Holiness continued saying: I have a lot of obstacles whenever I do a pilgrimage like this. During the bicycle pilgrimage, my robe was caught in a wheel and I hurt myself, but I didn’t tell anyone; I just continued. Half way through, a jeep knocked me so badly that I was thrown in the air, I fell down and broke my nose. I wasn’t worried about my nose, I was just worried about my bicycle and my injured knee. If I couldn’t continue, the pilgrimage had to stop. So I pushed myself to continue, peddling only with one leg. During Sikkim Pad Yatra, I slipped on a very small stone and injured my ankle, on my way to one of the holiest sites of Guru Rinpoche. I could have told the group to continue and allowed myself to discontinue the Pad Yatra and check into a hotel. I pushed myself to continue even though my entire leg was swollen due to the injured ankle. This time at the beginning of the Pad Yatra, so many blisters appeared after just a few hours of easy walk and my backpack became heavier by the day without me adding any additional things.

His Holiness' foot

In fact, I removed my tent and some belongings, yet it still got heavier by the day, even my strong monks couldn’t believe how heavy my backpack has become. And of course, I caught a flu two days back and lost my voice, because of this, I couldn’t teach until this morning. All these I know are manifestations of Mara, to stop me from accomplishing great merit and great purification, and they know that if they stop me, the entire Pad Yatra has to end prematurely. You can check my backpack, how heavy it is, it is like having invisible rocks in it. I am not telling you this to scare you or boost my ego, Mara and his manifestations are with us all the time. Whenever we are off guard, they will win the battle. Persevere in spiritual practice fearlessly with joyful effort!

NAMO GURUBHYE, BUDDHAYA, DHARMAYA, SANGHAYA, GURU DEWA DAKINI DHARMAPALA!
All Buddhas and Bodhisattvas, please heed me and witness my aspirations!
In your presence,

1. I aspire that I would quickly gain the realisations, wisdom, compassion, knowledge and other necessary qualities to be able to help sentient beings to cross the ocean of samsara and attain Buddhahood.

2.  I aspire that I would swiftly gain the ability to skilfully cut through all the layers of wrong-views and misunderstandings of all sentient beings who have a karmic connection and even those who do not, so that they would be able to extract the fullest benefit of the supreme Buddhadharma and quickly gain the wisdom and compassion and other qualities of the Buddhas.

By the blessing of the Triple gems, the truth of dharmata, and the irreversible intent of Sangha, may these wishes come true swiftly.
Tadyatha Pentsa Driya Awa Bodha Naye Soha!

The mind is trained by relinquishing, for the sake of others, the three foundations of ego-clinging (the body, possessions, and the roots of virtue).  Beginners, however, should not actually surrender them in reality.  For it is also said that if we try to do so without being truly able to, the outcome will be nothing but a parody.  If therefore we train and habituate our minds to the generous attitude of offering these three foundations to others, there is no contradiction in saying that we will perfect the paramita of generosity, even if in reality we do not actually give any of them even slightly.  On the other hand, when people make charitable donations without having a generous attitude, their action is a mere imitation of generosity.  It is therefore crucial to school and habituate ourselves in an openhanded and generous frame of mind…

We must relinquish everything for the benefit and happiness of all without exception — and we must do so sincerely and unparsimoniously, without counting the cost or expecting some recompense or karmic advantage in return.  This is an essential pith instruction that drives out the fiend of ego-clinging, the root of samsara.  Whenever thoughts of cherishing and attachment toward our bodies arise, we should face up to them squarely and at once, never losing sight of the view of No-self, emptiness and nonreferential compassion.  This will ensure that we are on the supreme path and that beings, who are like illusory visions, will never be abandoned…

It is said in the Shikshasamucchaya:

Let this most crucial point be grasped
Whereby no downfall will occur:
My body and my worldly wealth
And all my virtues gained and being gained and to be gained
I give them all to everyone,
Protecting, cleansing and increasing them.

But how is it possible to give up our virtue, since it is precisely through virtue that nirvana is gained? The accumulation of virtue or merit brings rebirth in the higher realms, and this is the foundation of the path. It is the necessary prerequisite for the occurrence in the mind of the truth of the path – the realization of the personal and phenomenal No-Self. (Now with regard to the personal No-Self) it is said that when the emotional obscurations are discarded, the resulting “nirvana without remainder” of the Shravakas and Pratyekabuddhas is like a fire or a butter lamp going out for want of fuel.  By contrast, nirvana as understood in the Mahayana is the result of the removal of the two kinds of obscuration together with their habitual tendencies. Therefore, (as the Sutralankara says) liberation is no more than the exhaustion of error. Apart from the mere separation from the two obscurations, there is nothing extra to be attained. And as for the truth of the path, this is likened to a raft, which is to be left behind as soon as the far shore has been reached. Consequently, it is generally said that worldly virtue, bounded and confined by ego-clinging, is not actually effective in the attainment of liberation. In particular, since compounded virtue must be entirely relinquised if one is to attain the final result of perfect Buddhahood, it definitely follows that we must give it all away.

In the second place, we might wonder why it is necessary to abandon the three foundations of ego-clinging (body, possessions and roots of virtue) even when we are not actually intending to achieve nirvana. The answer to this is that, even if we do not give them away now, the fact is that when we die, we will have to leave behind both body and possessions. And as for our virtues, either these will have been exhausted by moments of anger experienced in the past or else (if this is not the case) they will be consumed by the single experience of their fully ripened result. It is certain therefore that everything is destined to be entirely and pointlessly lost. Therefore, in the present moment when we have freedom to act, it is best to give everything to other beings for their happiness and benefit. For in this way, the merit of such an action will not be exhausted but will become the cause of attaining the supreme goal.

My own comments:  Many people practising the dharma think about acquiring more and more.  They think of merit as some kind of spiritual currency.  But they lose track of the main point of dharma, which is to cut through the ego-clinging and self-centredness.  Some others think only of gaining realisation and meditating but neglect the essential practices of the other paramitas eg, in this case generosity.  It is to be seen here that generosity is a very skilful method to cut through ego-clinging, to create the conditions (ie merit) for realisations to arise.  Realisations are basically about realising emptiness and egolessness.  That takes place on a more subtle level.  We have to start from the grosser levels by performing acts of the physical level like generosity and mentally cultivating the attitudes of letting go and taking a loss and giving up/surrender.  All these prepares the eventual ground for subtle work of realisation to occur spontaneously.  That is why Buddhism emphasizes on creating merits.

However, some people mistake the emphasis on merit to be something to be grasped to and thereby fortify their ego all over again albeit now under a spiritual guise.  Some even mistake the emphasis on merits to be a worldly dharma, ie, a spiritual way to increase their worldly enjoyments.  They create merits to increase wealth, health and other worldly goals.  All these will only trap one further in samsara.  Therefore, the Buddha taught that even the merits are to be given away.  Dedication is a special point of the Buddha’s doctrine.  In the ultimate end, there is nothing to be held on to, just groundlessness.  This is a subtle but very important point that many people have missed. And it takes alot of time to understand this.  It is a important view, not to be belittled.

Although it is said that the main emphasis is on the mental attitude of generosity, let this NOT be misconstrued by some people as being permission to simply think of giving but not actually give.  This is just another form of self-deception.  Frankly speaking, when one has that generous frame of mind, giving will take place in reality according to one’s ability.  But the teaching here emphasizes that one should not be creating an appearance of giving without the actual attitude of generosity.  Both should go hand-in-hand.

Update :

Garchen Rinpoche said, “Of all the charities of giving, the giving away of one’s own body and giving Dharma teachings are the most beneficial to the practitioner. It is written in the Kalachakra Tantra that when one is able to make an offering of horses and elephants the merits accumulated by those actions would be thousand fold. Where if a practitioner is able to give away one’s wife or husband or sons and daughters the benefit would be a hundred thousand fold and even more beneficial than that when one is able to give away one’s own body as offering the benefit would be million fold”

(Note:  This is in relation to a practice called Chod where one visualises oneself offering one’s own body to all Buddhas/Bodhisattvas and sentient beings.)

Again, Rinpoche said:

“It is said than when you give charity, the things you give away in this life is said to be your own food in your next life journey, so it is very, very important. After sometimes when you give you will realize that when you give to sentient beings, you the giver and others the receivers you will really find that both the giver and the receiver are the same. There is not an iota of difference between the two, the reason for that is that when you give, you are the one to receive the benefits. So you are the giver and as result you will be the receiver, just like you see I gave you the example of looking after, keeping a house spick and span with the motivation of benefiting whoever is going to be the next occupant. If you keep it in good condition thinking that it does not matter whoever comes, whoever comes there will find a pleasant place to live in there, who knows if it is going to be yourself. But on the other hand just being so self-centered because you are living in that house and you don’t care about who is going to be the next occupant. If you plunder everything, tear down the walls, take steal frames doors and windows, then in all probability is going to be you the one who is going to occupy this very house. So from this hopefully you will learn some more profound meaning of giving.”

From the Dharma point of view, although these people are often pursuing self-centered pursuits and their goals are frequently of the worldly mundane sort however, I can feel some kind of ‘devotion’ to these people because of the enormity of sacrifice and total full-heartedness and completeness of their dedication to their work.

In the past, our lineage masters have exhibited similar qualities, for example, Milarepa and Longchen Rabjam, etc, who have given up everything to pursue enlightenment and benefit for sentient beings.  Although the goals and significance is greatly different, but the kind of qualities they bring to their chosen work is similar.

In present days, in the dearth of examples like Milarepa to follow, we can look at these worldly people who are not very different from us, how, for example, a pianist has to spend up to 6-9 hours daily practising, or swimmers/ athletes who have to train very hard for their competitions with great focus, discipline on their training and diet etc, just to slice off that few seconds in their performance on the competition day.  All so much effort for worldly purposes.  And here we are the ‘Dharma practitioners’ who wish to attain the ultimate goal of all – Buddhahood – and who wish to benefit all beings, are we bringing the same qualities to our life?

I feel that my admiration for such people will have a great impact on my own attitude to life.  I see that in these people, they do not know what is the meaning of ‘impossible’, they do not know how to say ‘no’ or ‘I can’t’ to themselves.  They challenge their own limits, and thus they live their life to their fullest, using time in its best way by harnessing those qualities of full dedication, focus, discipline.

The best way to live our life is to challenge our own limits and want to use time to its fullest.  In Dharma practice, this is also true.  We do not want to pass life passively, sloppily, wishing for time to pass, just waiting out for tomorrow to come, always waiting for the next distraction, excitement or entertainment.  Even Dharma practitioners can become like that, it is like having lost a sense of direction or living-force in life.

Instead, we should cultivate the qualities of discipline, mindfulness, focus, perseverance.

We usually see in those people who have these qualities, a kind of vibrance and happiness on their countenance.  Although the going is tough, the goal may be small and they may lack the realisations of non-self or emptiness that puts a complete end to all suffering,  but these people have the satisfaction of knowing that they have given their fullest, best and everything to what they believe in.  To me, it almost seems like Zen.

Today I was discussing this with a friend and I thought that I would make some notes on my thoughts and share it with all of you.  We can read about such people and learn from their qualities.  Please carpe diem and please make the fullest of your precious human life, cherish your time and always challenge yourself to do better.  You may not know it, but you have a jewel in your hands already. Do not let stagnancy or pessimism control you.  Don’t shift the blame to others or the situation.  There is no need to compete with others.  The main point is always to outdo ourselves.  And remember, the fullest potential in every moment and in your whole life always always always lies in your hands.

]]> http://bodhiactivity.wordpress.com/2011/12/31/full-life/feed/ 0 bodhiactivity http://bodhiactivity.wordpress.com/2011/12/23/aspirations/ http://bodhiactivity.wordpress.com/2011/12/23/aspirations/#comments Fri, 23 Dec 2011 03:30:34 +0000 bodhiactivity http://bodhiactivity.wordpress.com/?p=644 ]]> Said by the 17th Karmapa Trinley Thaye Dorje

Making aspiration prayers, for Buddhists, is one of our most important practices. From the Buddhist perspective and understanding, all auspicious and joyous experiences in life come from our aspirations. The more prayers of aspiration are offered the more joyous experiences it brings to people’s lives.

Aspiration prayers support us both in this life and for our future rebirth. The reason why it is essential to our practice and beneficial is because the experience of the external existence is brought about by consciousness. So, every thought that occurs matters to the outcome of the external experience. Aspirations guide the consciousness to a perfect process of the function of mind. It is a path where consciousness is not disturbed by any unnecessary thoughts or actions. The main ingredient in aspirations is the motivation, the intention to benefit others wholeheartedly out of unconditioned mind. Such a practice can be applied by anyone no matter their culture, religion, philosophy etc.

Normally in a tragedy, we are often stunned and dazed. We don’t realize the mental support that we can provide. So, the practice of aspirations is there to benefit others not only temporarily but beyond, as well.

There are many ways to help others, like through means of generosity and such but there are some things that can only really be reached through aspirations, that really soothe those victims who are present as well as those who have passed. Aspirations help those who have passed away to have a peaceful and smooth transition into the next life and give freedom for whichever way they wish to be reborn. The end result of the aspiration practice is that of peace and courage.